Mother draws backlash for telling her 15-year-old son that he couldn't take his stepmother to his mother-son football team event: 'She's not his mom, nor did she have the respect to call/text me and ask how I felt about it'

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  • So my 15 year old son has a mother and son dinner event with his football team. I'm obviously planning to go as it'd be nice. bonding time and well..im his mother. Today, my son told me that my ex's wife was planning to go but she didnt say a word to me about it. In all honesty, I dont want her to go.
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  • Yes, shes been in my son's life the passed like 5 years or so but shes not his mom nor did she have the respect to call/text me and ask how I felt about it. Would I be TA if I politely told her I didn't want her to go? Im just really conflicted.
  • Edit: Thank you for your comments!! You made me realize that it's not really my event, that its my son's so he should decide. He said he'd like us both to go which is perfectly fine with me. Im human and my feelings clouded my judgement. I actually really appreciate Reddit for this. Sometimes you just cant see the entire picture. Thanks guys!
  • OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a h le: I want to tell my son's step mother she can't go to the mother and son dinner event. I might be the AH because she is his step mother and both are allowed to go.
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  • Sioux-me I see your edit and I just want to say good for you. You put your son first. You're a good mom.
  • No-Assignment5538 YTA. This is going to be really really hard for you: You are not the one who gets to make this choice. It is about what your son wants. Does he want you there? her? both of you? IF your son wants her there, you need to respect that.
  • keesouth Do whatever your son wants to do. She can come to as many events she wants to but she'll never take your place. Always remember your kid only benefits when more people love him.
  • New_Beach1011. This is your son's event. It depends how he feels about it. Who does he want there? How many can go? I don't think you get the final say when he has two maternal figures in his life. YTA

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